Dear diary, I'm worried about the kind of peace of mind I have these days, knowing fully well that examinations are one-month plus away and I have not read a thing. As much as I desire peace of mind, I think this kind of peace of mind is a threat to my life. Midnight reading has become history. The rate at which I sleep scares me. How do I overcome this lethargy? How do I fight it?
Academics is just one of the many things I have on my hands, yet I have lost the enthusiasm to do any of these things. My spirit is always willing, but my body is too weak to do any of them. Procrastination has become my daily business. All I do these days is promise myself that I will do them, then I end up not doing them, at this point anxiety begins to creep in.
All of these are probably happening because I have stayed longer than normal in this school... studying a 4 year course in 5 years and still counting. I have lost all the studentship in me. But this is not enough to mess everything up. All I just need is courage and motivation to start again and march harder.
My resolve in this new week is to give it whatever it takes... return to my midnight reading table and go back to the good student that I used to be to avoid academic wotowoto. Hopefully next week, I will come back to tell you about my progress on this and my other experiences during the week.
By Pearl
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